Quotes

The reason why worry kills more people than work is that more people worry than work.
-Robert Frost

The easiest job in the world has to be coroner. Surgery on dead people. What's the worst thing that could happen? If everything went wrong, maybe you'd get a pulse
-Dennis Miller

Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?
-Edgar Bergen

Doing nothing is very hard to do...you never know when you're finished.
-Leslie Nielsen

The trouble with unemployment is that the minute you wake up in the morning you're on the job.
-Slappy White

It's just a job. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. I beat people up.
-Muhammad Ali

I like work: it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours.
-Jerome K Jerome

In olden times, sacrifices were made at the altar, a practice that still continues.
-Helen Rowland

I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
-Rita Rudner

When a man brings his wife flowers for no reason, there's a reason.
-Molly McGee

I'm so old they've cancelled my blood type.
-Bob Hope

As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two...
-Sir Norman Wisdom

People say that age is just a state of mind. I say it's more about the state of your body.
-Geoffrey Parfitt

One of the most difficult things in the world is to convince a woman that even a bargain costs money.
-Edgar Watson Howe

Brigands demand your money or your life; women require both.
-Samuel Butler

The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.
-Andy Rooney